THE DAILY BLADE: Super Bowl Special
As is usually the case, The Stiletto doesn’t really have a dog in the fight, so she will join her fellow Republicans and conservatives in rooting for the Packers in Super Bowl XLV (a poll commissioned by the Hollywood Reporter finds that Dems prefer the Steelers 45 percent to 41 percent, whereas Repubs overwhelmingly choose the Packers 53 percent to 33 percent. Oh, and Steelers QB Ben Rapistberger is the most disliked player amongst the two teams.
Seeing as how The Stiletto is not familiar with either team’s fan rituals to begin with, this year’s Super Bowl is going to be especially confusing: both teams have the same fight song – only with slightly different words; Green Bay Packers Coach Mike McCarthy is a Pittsburgh native; and the company that manufactures the Steelers’ Terrible Towel is located in WI.
Here’s another head-scratcher: The discredited meme that “more women are victims of domestic violence on Super Bowl Sunday than on any other day of the year” has now morphed into the equally dubious claim that as many as 100K hookers – roughly 40 percent of them underage – are flocking to Dallas to “flock” the fans. The Dallas Observer calculates that, if true, “every man, woman and child holding a ticket would have their [sic] own personal hooker, from the vice presidential wing of FedEx to Little Timmy from Green Bay”:
The city was gearing up for a massive invasion of skanks and sex fiends. It would be like Normandy, only with way more plastic surgery - the largest single gathering of freaks and pedophiles the world has ever seen. …
All evidence says that America's call girls will be at home, watching the game of TV, just like you and me.
Judging by Super Bowls past, the mass migration of teenage sex slaves is nothing more than myth. …
The routine is the same in every Super Bowl city. The media beats the drum of impending invasion, warning that anywhere from 15,000 to 100,000 hookers will soon arrive. …
[P]olice Sergeant Tommy Thompson of Phoenix, which hosted the 2008 Super Bowl. "We may have had certain precincts that were going gangbusters looking for prostitutes, but they were picking up your everyday street prostitutes," Thompson says of his vice cops. "They didn't notice any sort of glitch in the number of prostitution arrests leading up to the Super Bowl."
Conspicuously noted: He doesn't recall a single arrest of an underage girl.
Perhaps Phoenix was an anomaly. So let's go to Tampa, host of Super Bowl 2009. Police spokeswoman Andrea Davis says her department ran special operations on the sex trade. They came up empty. "We didn't see a huge influx in prostitutes coming into Tampa," she says. "The arrests were not a lot higher. They were almost the same."
Men entering Cowboys Stadium can expect to get their junk touched, so maybe that’s how the rumor started.
Editorial Note: If the menu for your Super Bowl shindig or tailgate party has a spot for one more dish, check out these chili recipes from Stiletto Sports.
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